A king's greatness depends on how many people he rules; without them he is nothing - Proverbs 14:28 GNT

Civil rights leader Benjamin L. Hooks once said "He that thinketh he leadeth and hath no one following him is only taking a walk."

Our movement will always need to be bigger than us.

It needs to bless more people than just us.

It needs to be committed to the growth of others beyond us.

And if it’s just about us, we will have problems.

Sometimes, however, though we surround ourselves with people, it’s still just about us.

An entourage is a double edged sword.

It pays to have a team of collaborators. We benefit from families that support us. And in battle, you may need a gang.

But an entourage is a different thing:

They may be followers or fans. They may be family and friends.

But they can take us places we don’t want to go.

Your entourage can propel you forward or derail you entirely. They can inspire you to rise higher or drag you into conflicts you never would have entered.

And that’s why our relationship to the group matters.

1. Leadership can be lonely. Sometimes we succumb to a desire to be one of the gang. And if we have unresolved insecurities, and seek validation from our followers, praise can make us do things we otherwise wouldn’t. This is a good way to crash and burn

2. Leadership can be humbling. We can have contempt for the people around us. They may not fit our sense of self. We may mistreat them because we think we deserve better. This is a good way to burn bridges.

3. Leadership can be draining. Sometimes the people have needs greater than our capacity to give. And if we don’t have boundaries we can overcommit ourselves. If we haven’t built a team we can overtax ourselves. This is a good way to burn out.

But most of us would rather burn brighter. We would rather burn longer. And to do that, we will need put our people in the right spaces, treat them right, and build them into who they are called to be, not just who we wish they were, and what we'd like them to do for us.

When we trust in the size of our entourage, and not the strength of our conviction, or the size of our God, we will be prone to panicking whenever people leave us.

If we have abandonment issues (I’ve got plenty), multiply this by 100.

And that’s when we start manipulating, and bullying, and compromising on our values, to hold onto people who are demonstrating they are not for us

The challenge is that when people come into our lives, and our organizations, we have a tendency to daydream.

We want to anticipate what God is doing, so we draw conclusions about why the person has arrived.

We begin to imagine how valuable they could be on our team. Like a person desperate for connection planning weddings after one good date, we start imagining the life of our organization with them in position.

We are lusting after them, rather than loving them, denying both them and us of the experience of authentic fellowship. They don’t get the chance to just experience belonging. We don’t get a chance to see who they are. All we see is their talent, or money, or status.

But you can’t build on gifts; you can only build on character.

You can’t build a relationship on height, or a silhouette, but you can get yourself in a world of trouble by trying

Without right relationship with our people, we will never be great

Sure, you’re leading them. The question is where?

How are you leading them to think and behave?

Are you bringing out the best in them or the worst?

Are you preparing them for life without you, or teaching them to fear it?

Are you training them to stay close to you, or teaching them to fly?

Are you leading them to be more like you, or more like God?

Leadership is a sacred trust. It can lay a foundation others can build on or create problems others must heal from.

If we make good choices we will be a blessing.

If we make bad ones, we will be a curse.

Choose wisely.

(Photo Credit: Ann H.)